Category Archives: Mundane Shenanigans

All that isn’t anything else

Wednesday Wisdom – The First Leg

So, we left off in Whitehorse. Woah.

Eons ago.

So I left Whitehorse.  Many mental tears were shed. I’m one of those man-girls, you know, keepin’ it composed to preserve my delicate ego, but bawling my eyes out in Where the Wild Things are.  Or in movie previews. Oh wait. That was our friend Kathy  while we waited for Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (awesome, disturbing). Sorry Kathy. I hope you read my blog. Don’t worry, there are only like.. two people who both read this blog and know who your are. You’re a trooper.

Right, left Whitehorse.  Next two destinations: California for some fam n’ gram time, and Steamboat Springs, Colorado (the other homestead, and my current location).

California involved Bronzed-senior-ville (AKA Palm Springs), Newport Beach, and Eight-year-old-slash-Brittany-topia (Disneyland What?!).

Stuff was learned:

1) Golf is a mixed bag.  You have to look like a tool, but you eventually like it.  Ball caps.. grow on you.  You may wind up sinking your ball in the water more often than not, but the one or two not‘s ….. pretty much make you Tiger.  Getting to see your brothers aged 6 and 7 kick golf’s arse… and still have melt downs… totally worth it. Admittedly love feeling like the mature sibling. It’s not the 13 year age difference Dad, it’s my impressive strength of character.

2) PSA to the Entire Palm Springs Population: Even though the plastic is under your skin… you aren’t hiding it from anyone. Angelina Jolie (I checked during the golden globes) still has her lips, so thievery has been ruled out.

3) Apparently windmills decapitate birds sometimes.  Once your head has been shat upon, you’ll be as keen on renewable energy as I am.

4) Southern California weather boggles the mind. Sunny and 25°ish (in Real degrees) every-freaking-day.

5) They sell hummus and veggies at Disneyland.  And roasted portobello sandwiches.  Way to be with it Mickey.

6) Star Wars defies all boundaries.  Age, gender, stereotypes, screw it, we are ALL suckers for Yoda.  Star Wars took over the land of Disney.  The only merchandise that I left Disney with? Star Wars junk. OH and after the Star Tours ride, brothers will easily forget that they almost opted for the build-a-bear work shop and Darth Vader themed-bears over the amazing land of joy, happiness, and magic.  Ugh. Boys. At the end of it all it was… “Stinkin. Awesome”. Their words.

7) Leaving the amazing land of joy, happiness, and magic is doable if it means snow, more brother time, healthful plant-y food, and THE BEST puppy. BEST. PUPPY.

8) The brother henceforth known as K is an enigma wrapped in.. well… a six year old.  Kid loses his mind for olives, 100% raw cacao nibs, and coconut water.  Do. You. KNOW how long it me took to try “sophisticating” my palate?! I still gag on olives. Oh I eat them. They will not defeat me.  But I will gag.  He will decimate an olive jar, but asparagus gets this attitude.

9) Put a 6 year old in a hockey tournament, don’t be surprised if you get this.

10) A kid can be traumatized and terrified by Mac n’ Cheese that isn’t Annie’s OR having to carry a heavier backpack than his brother, but will be totally cool with bombing down a steep pitch fit for an NCAA women’s alpine race.

11) Get one brother to jump in the icy water beside the hot springs, the other will follow. Even if the first one writhes and screams. Rivalry is power.

12) Somehow, I’m drinking more in the company of parents here than I ever did in university. So selfless of them to condition me for Europe.

12) Come to Steamboat Springs, the snow is finally here. I’ll make you food.  My family will pour you a glass of wine.

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Wednesday Wisdom

1. Over-sized bubble wrap was made only for jump-dancing on top of. ONLY. Don’t stop if people ask why you are playing DDR on top of packing materials, Don’t Stop.

2. Someone found my blog by googling “drink wine”, it’s funny…. because I’m pathetic at it.

3. Maybe my neighbours can see me dancing around my room in my towel, maybe they can’t. As long as neither of us speaks of it, I’m no worse off.

4. Accept it as a challenge when your roommate uses (five alarm) Indian “Chilly” powder instead of conventional Chili powder in her vegetable chili.  If you don’t eat the whole bowl and sweat buckets while your insides dance the salsa, you are weak and you are not a foodie.

5. I think the grass got greener in the past two weeks. Christmas what?

6. I have a bruise at the base of my skull. It’s from studying. Don’t ask.

7. If your Ethics teacher starts telling you about how his life has changed since he started Aderol, and how he thinks it should really be distributed unregulated among students, and then asks you “why the heck he hasn’t been tenured yet”… if you still haven’t written your exam, don’t answer him.

8. Roommates know best.  Christmas gifts that involve thought, time and creativity instead of bajillions of dollars are worth more than my words.

9. GOODBYE IS NOT GOODBYE. Tomorrow I leave Ottawa. Back to Northern homeland. Thank god you are amazing, homeland, because stealing me from my friends is quite the task.

10. Taking notes on an iPad leads to autocorrected notes. Rastafarian has nothing to do with Environmental Science.. If you will excuse me.. I need to go translate now.

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Wednesday Wisdom

1. Filling vs. Crust? Filling. Always. Sure, to each their own. Whatever. But come on. Especially cookie crumb crusts. As a rule I discard them, I’m sorry hippy gods, don’t hold this wasteful-ness against me. And Hilary, don’t hold this against me either, the tart rocked.

2. Sometimes Canada is embarrassing. Yeah, I said it. I LOVE Canada, majorly love. Best country.  Inhabitant for life yo. But seriously, that includes its clean water  and other natural super things. Kyoto’s for the cool kids.

3. You should definitely “like” something on facebook if you chuckle to yourself while saying “I like this.” To complete the process you press the button while saying “LIKE” aloud. Always. This is how things happen here. I’m no “like” hussy, throwin’ “like”s around like pocket change.

4. I do not know how I’m going to be able to handle beverages in Europe. Ok not me, my bod. I.. just. Ugh. Café? All I need is a thoroughly steeped black tea and my digestion shifts up a gear. Vin? Half a glass and I’m your bestie sharin’ secrets. Oh and you had better hope I’ve already eaten. I’m not built for the wild side. May the force be with me.

5. “Boy Splits”. What are these? Someone googled this and found my blog. I’m thinking either flexible men… or… men surrounded by ice cream, strawberries and pineapple, and topped with whipped cream.  I will refrain from commenting on either. My blog? Really?

6. When it is time to study Taxation (does it seem like it’s always time to study Taxation? I think yes.), it is actually time to bake oatmeal cookies.

7. When it is time to get your junk the H-E-double-hockey-stick together and pack, it is actually time to make CSS adjustments to your blog layout.  And then screw something up that prevents people from clicking on the “About” or “Recipe” tabs. I’m sorry. Not the sharpest tool in the shed.

8. Before you go to bed, start getting excited about the future (or um, CHRISTMAS). All of your dreams will be magical real-ish future possibilities.  Beware of the whole “they aren’t real yet” thing for when you wake up.  You need breakfast eventually.

9. Make sure, when you find a good friend (a real keeper), that a goodbye is never a goodbye. Make sure it’s a “see you later”. Some real Britt-Wisdom.

10. If you want to try the beans to end all other beans, go to the Ottawa Sunday Farmers Market and tackle a plate from bearbrook farms. Thank me later.

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(Another Belated) Wednesday Wisdom

Yeah, these kind of distracted me last night when I was supposed to be writing about my wisdom.  I’ll tell you all about these soon.

1.  I read a blog post about proper man shaving. I liked it. I’m not even a proper man. I feel like shaving in this way makes a man 52.5X more appealing.  Ryan Gosling must shave with a straight razor.

2.  Sometimes for every 4 christmas gifts you buy, you accidentally wind up with a sweater for you. Don’t feel bad, it’s getting chilly. Just don’t do it again.

3. I don’t care if the snow melted, it’s still time to start watching Love Actually every week.

4. The snow melted. Rollerblade-ability aside, snowless Decembers suck butt.

5.  If you’re looking for satisfaction, come to my house. I will then instruct you how to spread a stick of butter across a soft yeasted dough and thus laminate it, eventually resulting in soft flaky crescent rolls. What else did you think would happen at my house. That’s how I show people a good time.

6.  Real Life: waxing your legs means your roommates aren’t allowed to look at funny when you pet your lower thighs. allthetime. Oh and leg waxing+harry potter watching+brownies = obviously done all of my final 4th year assignments at Carleton University Ever.

7. If you want your guests to stay for dessert, don’t serve them pumpkin mac n cheese and flaky buttery crescent rolls.  They will be forced to roll home early to watch the Kardashians or lose consciousness, though the activities are synonymous.  Those guests that do stay will require you to loan them stretchy-pants.

8. Running down rocky a hill covered with leaves will be henceforth be referred to as “ankle roulette”. Stressful, fall-y, and hurty.

9. If your arms are sore, figure out why before you go blubbering about it in public. People will ask you why. You will be forced to tell them that it’s … Because… you…  took a really big trip to the bulk barn. Kinda uncool.

9. Don’t let your mom talk to other people’s moms. She will say things like, “Did you know that my daughter loves your son?”. Context mom, these things need context.

10. T-minus 25 days to Christmas

11. T-minus 52 days to Paris. Boo-yah. Oh. Speaking of Boo-yah. Thank you Megan for throwing this into my life.

12.  Read this hysteria. Thank you Natalie.

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Wednesday Wisdom

Apologies for my disgusting photo-less ness. ew.

1. It is never too early to start Christmas Baking while listening to Bing Crosby, Tchaicovsky, Michael Buble, and… TransSiberian Orchestra. Christmas baking includes baking ginger cookies for yourself. If you’re listening to Christmas music, it’s Christmas baking. Let that be a lesson.

2. IT SNOWED. I walked to school with a super stupid grin on my face today. Yeah I’ma smile at you. No I don’t have a reason. It’s snowing.

3. If you don’t put away your UGGs, I’m going to deliberately splash in the slushy salty snow beside you while wearing my wellies just to prove that your footwear is inappropriate. Your toes will feel soggy and gross. Put them away. Let that be another lesson.

4. Raw fish can taste good. At first I was afraid, I was petrified, kept thinking I could never live with raw fish by my side. Oh I’ve spend so many nights, thinking raw fish was so wrong… then I grew strong, yes I learned how to get alooooong!! I didn’t go to outerspace, I had some well seasoned raw tuna last night at the dishcrawl. Woah.

5. Tax class is balls. Major. Nobody likes it. All I have to do is tell people that I have a class called Taxation II and I get apologies.  Now get this, it’s totally even worse than it sounds. Blew your mind? sorry.

6. If you are chewing right now, CLOSE YOUR MOUTH. If you open your mouth at any point during the mastication of your foodstuff it will be considered a misdemeanor and you will face consequences. like a pat on the back. of the head. with a cast iron pan.

7. The leftover nut butter that you scrape from the sides of the jar has zero calories. Obviously. I mean you technically already ate it. Get out your spatulas.

8. I do not/cannot get less than 8 hours of sleep.  If I’m going to wake up at six to write a paper before a morning class I will put myself to bed before ten. My body will otherwise refuse to accept paper-writing.

9. MUST MAKE THIS.

10. Daydreaming about being Martha Stewart is sane and normal. Every twenty year old does this. Every one who… lives… in… Brittany’s room. There’s only one bed in her room. It’s a double. But only one person sleeps in it. ever. It’s just me. Damn.

11. Tell me what you want for Christmas. Besides me. And my hugs. Goes. Without. Saying.

12. IT SNOWED. Deserved two points.

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Wednesday Wisdom

1.  Pickles are awesome. I forgot about pickles for a year. Why? I’m not sure, but now I’m going to go eat a whole jar of pickles.

2. Bikes > Cars. Hilary and I won the Ottawa Foodie Challenge this weekend. You have no idea how honoured we were to win this squishy dog toy sandwich. But actually. It came with tonnes of other cool prizes.

3. NOBODY will let you roll your own sushi. Don’t ask. The sushi lady will probably chase you out of her shop with her eyes.

4. If every meal has been accompanied by a cookie, your day has been swell.

5. Sometimes it doesn’t really REALLY sink in that you’re going somewhere, until you google map streetview your new abode.  Then you flip out and creep through the entire city of Paris on streetview. It’s not easy let me tell you.

6. Even if all he phoned you for was to tell you what type of dinosaur sprinkles he put on his sundae, it’s always worth it to talk to your baby brother.

7. REAL (montreal style) Bagels can and should be used as currency, and I dare go as far as to say Christmas gifts.

8. When in doubt, just name your team after the Yukon. The novelty just doesn’t wear off over here.

9. Climate Change is so legit. It was 18°C earlier this weak. Top three coldest global capitols my arse. My body is confused by this weather and keeps on putting long pants on to go running.  If I sweat hard enough, the weather will change. I know these things.

10. “Happiness can be found in even the darkest of times, if only one remembers to turn on the light.” – Albus Dumbledore. I’m beginning to see it Dumbledore. T-1 month until Christmas.

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(belated) Wednesday Wisdom (yeah on thursday)

1) When the corporate strategic issues facing Ryanair are all that comes to mind when I close my eyes on wednesday night, chances are, Wednesday Wisdom is going to be late.  I have to deal with my shortcomings.

2) When in doubt, eat a giant carrot straight from the bag.  Apparently this is what I do when I’m bored, hungry, feeling nutrient deficient, feeling bad about myself, feeling good about myself. There’s no end to that list. I. eat. so. many. carrots. Not the worst habit, but sometimes carrot-top stumps show up in curious places.

3) Grey nail polish is fabulous. It goes with everything. Especially when your wardrobe consists of 70% grey. Also especially when you do nothing but study in your room, and can easily justify pairing a grey v-neck with grey yoga pants and a grey hoodie.  I like grey.

source: papillon blog

4) All i have to do is read the words “salt and vinegar” for mouth water. Crap. I just drooled.  Is this normal? Literally pass a recipe on foodgawker that SAYS “Salt and Vinagar…” and i have to swallow 8 times to contain my salivary glands.

5) Most entertaining google search leading to my blog this week = “Galette it be”. Mystery reader, you combined pastry and the Beatles, and found me. How this happened I do not know, but I don’t question awesomeness.

6) It’s been years since I had my major flight of the conchords phase… so I don’t know why, but lately I sing/announce everything I’m about to do in my head to the tune of “It’s business time“. Yeah. It’s environmental science, It’s environmental-science Tiiiiime. OR. It’s yoghurt, it’s yoghurt tiiiime. Oh and tonight is definitely going to bring a resurgence of…. It’s Vampire Diaries, It’s Vampire Diaries tiiiime.  Sometimes I sing these not just in my head. Ugh. I’m sorry roomies.

7) When you live away from home, there’s no one to tell you not to pour water all over your hot flat-top stove. Watching droplets freak out is THE BEST.

8) Don’t burp while leaning over. It’s unsettling.

 

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